please assess my essay5, please guys help me

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ahmad umar
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Joined: Mon Dec 29, 2014 4:31 pm

please assess my essay5, please guys help me

Post by ahmad umar »

It is better for children to grow up in the countryside than in a big city. Do you agree or disagree.
In this modern life, parents are trying to live in a place which be convenient and benefits for their children’s career and health. This can be seen that why people willing to live in big cities. It is disagreed that countryside is better place for children to grow up. This will be proven by analysing that how big cities provide educational opportunities as well as entertaining.
First of all, there are some beneficial reason that children should grow up in cities. For example, most standardized and international schools and kindergartens which are located in cities, moreover, kindergarten which are the basic step for preparing children to school, it can hardly be found in rural areas. This example clearly shows that parents who raised their children in urban, they definitely have a success career in future. Thus countryside would not provide such a opportunities.
Secondly, children need to have recreation and parent s should take away their children some kind of entertainment place. For example, children love playing football, riding bicycle in safe place such park, and swimming pool and so on, this sort of activities is difficult to find in the countryside. Thus, it is obvious that a big cities are a suitable place for children to spend their life and educated there.
In conclusion, it is believed that people who raise their children in city, they will have a healthy life besides will have more educational experience and talented than rural children. It is expected that people will migrate to cities for having standard lifestyle
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Flick
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Re: please assess my essay5, please guys help me

Post by Flick »

ahmad umar wrote:It is better for children to grow up in the countryside than in a big city. Do you agree or disagree.

In this modern life, parents are trying to live in a place which be convenient and benefits for their children’s career and health.(<--Reword to: "Nowadays, parents prefer to live somewhere convenient that also benefits their children's education and health.") This can be seen that why people willing to live in big cities.(<--Reword to: "This is why many people choose to live in big cities.") It is disagreed that the countryside is a better place for children to grow up. This will be proven by analysing how big cities provide educational opportunities as well as entertainment.

First of all, there are several reasons for children to grow up in cities. For example, most standardized and international schools and kindergartens are located in cities. Moreover, kindergartens, which are the basic step for preparing children for school, can hardly be found in rural areas. This example clearly shows that parents who raise their children in urban areas are concerned about their children's future success. The countryside would not provide such opportunities.

Secondly, children need to have recreation and parents should take their children to fun places. For example, children love playing football, riding bicycles in the park, swimming and so on. These types of activities are difficult to find in the countryside. Thus, it is obvious that big cities are a suitable place for children to grow up and be educated.

In conclusion, it is believed that children who are raised in a city will have a healthy life and gain more educational experience than rural children. It is expected that people will migrate to cities to experience this lifestyle
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