Page 1 of 1

Please grade my essay on 0-9 Scale

Posted: Wed Jun 18, 2014 8:30 am
by saqibali
Topic: The idea of having a single career is becoming an old fashioned one. The new fashion will be to have several careers or ways of earning money and further education will be something that continues throughout the life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

The increasing financial needs of people have forced them to adopt multiple professions and earning sources as well as to continue their education even after their first job. Some people encourages this trend citing its financial and learning benefits while some people discourages this trend citing its negative impacts on professional competency of people. In my opinion, one should choose any of the two options depending on his personal capability as well as specific requirements of his particular field. Analyzing relationship of specific capabilities of people with career as well as specific requirements of each profession will prove this opinion.

Success from multiple careers or earning sources depends on personal capabilities of people. Arguably, Some people possess capability to successfully handle multiple tasks while some people fail in their assignments when they focus on too many goals simultaneously. So, one should carefully assess his skills and specific personal capabilities before he dive to handle many jobs and additional qualification. A report issued by The New York Times in 1999 stated that single task handlers performed exceptionally good when they focused only on one task. Clearly, these types of people can earn a lot of money from one career than they would have earned from multiple tasks even if they have succeeded. Hence choosing one of the two paths depends on careful assessment of capabilities of the person.

One should carefully assess the specific requirements of all professions before he decided to adopt multiple careers. Arguably, some professions require a single minded full focus and dedication while some careers are simply signature jobs. So, one should carefully assess specific requirements of each profession to estimate his projected success. A Wise Assessment published by Washington Post states that multiple signature jobs can be handled simultaneously. Clearly, one can earn a lot of money if he adopts multiple career paths of this nature. Hence the significant role of such requirements in this decision can be understood.


After analyzing impact of personal capabilities and specific requirements of a career path, it is clear that one should carefully consider both these factors before he decides between one career or multiple careers. Hence it is recommended that people should go through extensive assessment before they take such decisions.

Re: Please grade my essay on 0-9 Scale

Posted: Mon Jun 30, 2014 10:38 pm
by Flick
saqibali wrote:Topic: The idea of having a single career is becoming an old fashioned one. The new fashion will be to have several careers or ways of earning money and further education will be something that continues throughout the life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

The increasing financial needs of people have forced them to adopt multiple professions and earning sources as well as to continue their education even after their first job. Some people encourages this trend, citing its financial and learning benefits while some people discourage this trend citing its negative impacts on the professional competency of some people. In my opinion, one should choose depending on his personal capability as well as specific requirements of his particular field. Analyzing the relationship of specific capabilities of people with career as well as specific requirements of each profession will prove this opinion.(<-- This is a very confusing sentence. Reword to: This essay will discuss the benefits and drawbacks of both options.)

Success from multiple careers or earning sources depends on thepersonal capabilities of the individual. Arguably, some people possess the capability to successfully handle multiple tasks while some people fail in their assignments when they focus on too many goals simultaneously. So, one should carefully assess his skills and specific personal capabilities before he tries to handle multiple jobs and additional qualifications. A report issued by The New York Times in 1999 stated that single task handlers performed exceptionally well when they focused only on one task. Clearly, these types of people can earn more money from one career than they would have earned from multiple tasks even if they succeeded. Hence, choosing one of the two paths depends on careful assessment of the capabilities of the person making the decision.

One should carefully assess the specific requirements of all professions before he decided to adopt multiple careers. Arguably, some professions require a single minded focus and dedication while some careers are simply signature jobs. So, one should carefully assess the specific requirements of each profession to estimate his projected success. A Wise Assessment published by Washington Post states that multiple signature jobs can be handled simultaneously. Clearly, one can earn a lot of money if he adopts multiple career paths of this nature. Hence the significant role of such requirements in this decision can be understood.


After analyzing the impact of personal capabilities and specific requirements of a career path, it is clear that one should carefully consider both these factors before he decides between one career or multiple careers. Hence it is recommended that people should go through extensive assessment before they make such a life changing decision.

Re: Please grade my essay on 0-9 Scale

Posted: Tue Jul 01, 2014 3:55 am
by cranford cliff
no grade , just a comment. The question is about multiple serial careers (one after the other) not multiple jobs at the same time (that require multi-tasking), and it is not really because of financial needs or hardship that people do this , but often from choice , or because they have out-dated skills, so need to re-train. The reference to 'thoughout their life' makes it clear it is about changing jobs/careers and retraining for new careers.
Some people prefer to take career breaks, to do other things , or to switch career to find more rewarding work, and company structures and hiring policies have become much more flexible to meet this trend.
So I feel your essay is 'off-topic' , and may lose marks on the 'task response', because you talk mainly about people with more than one job at the same time.

Also , avoid things like 'according to a report in NYT 1999' , and 'an assessment by the Washington Post', because it looks like you invented these pieces of evidence ! No-one, in IELTS writing, is expected to have such a detailed memory of statistics or study results.

Re: Please grade my essay on 0-9 Scale

Posted: Thu Jul 10, 2014 9:20 am
by saqibali
Topic: The idea of having a single career is becoming an old fashioned one. The new fashion will be to have several careers or ways of earning money and further education will be something that continues throughout the life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
This is an argumentative essay in which one has to support one side.

The below essay better matches with this modified topic.

Topic: The idea of having a single career is becoming an old fashioned one. The new fashion will be to have several careers or ways of earning money and further education will be something that continues throughout the life. Take your stance and discuss your opinion.

The increasing financial needs of people *have has forced them to adopt multiple professions or earning sources [better use “multiple streams of earning] as well as to [remove “to” to maintain coherence with previous part of sentence] continue their pursuit of education even after their first job. Some people encourages this trend citing its financial and learning benefits while some people discourages [better use alternative of discourage: denounce or slams] this trend citing [arguing] it’s negative impacts on professional competency of people. In my opinion, one should choose any of the two options depending on his personal capabilities [capabilities] as well as specific requirements of his particular field. [Being an argumentative essay, I should have taken one side in this essay rather taking stance on an intermediate opinion]Analyzing [both] relationship of specific capabilities of people with career as well as specific requirements of each profession will prove this opinion.

Success from multiple careers or earning sources depends on personal capabilities of people. Arguably, some people possess capabilities to successfully handle multiple tasks while some people fail in their assignments when they focus on too many goals simultaneously. So, one should carefully assess his skills and specific personal capabilities before he dive to handle many jobs and additional qualification. A report issued by The New York Times in 1999 stated that single task handlers performed exceptionally well when they focused only on one task. Clearly, these types of people can earn a lot of money from one career than they would have earned from multiple tasks even if they have [had] succeeded. Hence choosing one of the two paths depends on careful assessment of capabilities of the person.

One should carefully assess the specific requirements of all professions before he decided [decide] to adopt multiple careers. Arguably, some professions require a single minded full focus and dedication while some careers are simply a signature jobs. So, one should carefully assess specific requirements of each profession to estimate his projected success. A wise Assessment published by Washington Post states that multiple signature jobs can be handled simultaneously. Clearly, one can earn a lot of money if he adopts multiple career paths of this nature. Hence the significant role of such requirements in this decision can be understood.
After analyzing impact of personal capabilities and specific requirements of a career path, it is clear that one should carefully consider both these factors before he decides between one career or multiple careers. Hence it is recommended that people should go through extensive assessment before they take such decisions. [/quote]

Below I am re-writing this essay in argumentative style (the correct one)

Topic: The idea of having a single career is becoming an old fashioned one. The new fashion will be to have several careers or ways of earning money and further education will be something that continues throughout the life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Earning trends as well as education trends are changing with advancement of time. These days, people are adopting to multiple earning sources and tailoring to continuous pursuit of educational qualifications. It is argued that people should work for multiple channels of income and they should continuously update their education qualifications. Analyzing declining reliability of earning sources as well as climbing qualification demands of employer will prove this stance.
Firstly, earning sources are no more reliable as compared to past. Scientific breakthroughs make particular professions useless every day. For example, advancement in computer technologies has killed importance of typing skills within few years and in turn people of this profession are jobless these days. Realistically, scientific inventions make particular skills sets useless every day. Rate of these breakthroughs is increasing sharply as science is accelerating at very fast pace. A person who is dependent on multiple sources of income is less prone to such changes and thus his earning is more stable. Hence the important of multiple earning sources can be seen.
Secondly, climbing demands of higher qualifications of employers has made it necessary for employees to continuously pursue for advanced qualification through the life. Since all earning sources depends on competition, therefore, one is forced to continue his education through his life. For example, the minimum qualification threshold for lecturer position was bachelor, which now, has been upgraded to master level. This shows that if a person wants to stay competitive in this environment, he has to continuously acquire higher degrees thought his life. Thus importance of continuous pursuit of education thought life can be seen.
After analyzing volatility of earning sources and increasing qualifications competition in market, it is clear that one has to adopt multiple careers and pursue his education through his life to stay competitive. Thus, it is recommended that government should promote awareness among people to embrace and adopt this newly emerging trend.

Re: Please grade my essay on 0-9 Scale

Posted: Thu Jul 10, 2014 9:50 am
by saqibali
Dear readers,
Please re-rate my essay.Thats means, please assign it a band.