Please check and grade for IELTS task 2

Post your Task 1 or 2 response and/or read the responses of other students and provide feedback.
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kim_kitty
Posts: 4
Joined: Mon Jan 20, 2014 9:17 pm

Please check and grade for IELTS task 2

Post by kim_kitty »

Topic: Most schools offer some type of physical education program to their students. Why is physical education important? Should physical education classes be required or optional?

My essay is: Total words 274

Nowadays, physical education is very common in schools. As schools want their students to stay healthy and fit with the help of physical education.

Some people believe that it should be mandatory as part of their academic course, whereas on the other side some disagree and say it should be optional. In my point of view I believe physical education plays a very important role in student life. I have some strong reasons to believe this. Let me discuss in detail.

Firstly, I would like to support my opinion with the statement that “physical education helps students to develop their interest in sports”. As many times a child does not know what he/she can do other than studies and in this way becomes unaware of the advantages of sports in his/her life. Secondly, sometimes a student gets bored while doing repetitive curricular activities on a daily basis and wants to do something new and full of excitement. At that time physical education can be a good solution to get rid of boredom as it provides refreshment to the student physically and mentally.

On the other hand the flip side of the coin presents a different picture as some people believe that because of physical education students lose their interest in studies. Many times students get over involved in sports and do not pay enough time on academics.

In the end, as we see there are many aspects of this question, but in my opinion people should understand the value of physical education because this is good physical and mental exercise for the students. But students should maintain a balance between the sports and academics.

Thanks in Advance ....
kim_kitty
Posts: 4
Joined: Mon Jan 20, 2014 9:17 pm

Re: Please check and grade for IELTS task 2

Post by kim_kitty »

Please review my essay... :(
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OnlineEnglishTeacher
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Joined: Thu Jan 30, 2014 11:00 am
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Re: Please check and grade for IELTS task 2

Post by OnlineEnglishTeacher »

Nowadays, physical education is very common in schools. As schools want their students to stay healthy and fit with the help of physical education.

Some people believe that it should be mandatory as part of their academic course, whereas on the other side some disagree and say it should be optional. ("From") In my point of view I believe physical education plays a very important role in ("a student's") student life. I have some strong reasons to believe this. Let me discuss in detail.

Firstly, I would like to support my opinion with the statement that “physical education helps students to develop their interest in sports”. ("Quite frequently,") As many times a child does not know what ("they") he/she can do other than ("study") studies and in this way ("become") becomes unaware of the advantages of sports in ("their") his/her life. Secondly, sometimes a student gets bored while doing repetitive curricular activities on a daily basis and wants to do something new and full of excitement. At that time(",") physical education can be a good solution to get rid of boredom as it provides refreshment to the student physically and mentally.

On the other hand(",") the flip side of the coin presents a different picture as some people believe that because of physical education students lose their interest in studies. Many times(",") students get ("overinvolved") over involved in sports and do not pay enough ("attention") time ("to academic study") on academics.

In the end, as we see there are many aspects of this question, but in my opinion people should understand the value of physical education(",") because this is good ("for") physical and mental exercise for the students. But students should maintain a balance between the sports and academics.

I quite liked it - careful of grammar :-).




kim_kitty wrote:Topic: Most schools offer some type of physical education program to their students. Why is physical education important? Should physical education classes be required or optional?

My essay is: Total words 274

Nowadays, physical education is very common in schools. As schools want their students to stay healthy and fit with the help of physical education.

Some people believe that it should be mandatory as part of their academic course, whereas on the other side some disagree and say it should be optional. In my point of view I believe physical education plays a very important role in student life. I have some strong reasons to believe this. Let me discuss in detail.

Firstly, I would like to support my opinion with the statement that “physical education helps students to develop their interest in sports”. As many times a child does not know what he/she can do other than studies and in this way becomes unaware of the advantages of sports in his/her life. Secondly, sometimes a student gets bored while doing repetitive curricular activities on a daily basis and wants to do something new and full of excitement. At that time physical education can be a good solution to get rid of boredom as it provides refreshment to the student physically and mentally.

On the other hand the flip side of the coin presents a different picture as some people believe that because of physical education students lose their interest in studies. Many times students get over involved in sports and do not pay enough time on academics.

In the end, as we see there are many aspects of this question, but in my opinion people should understand the value of physical education because this is good physical and mental exercise for the students. But students should maintain a balance between the sports and academics.

Thanks in Advance ....
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