TOPIC:
On a recent holiday, you lost a valuable item. Fortunately, you have travel insurance to cover the cost of anything lost.
Write a letter to the manager of the insurance company. In your letter
1. Describe the item you lost
2. Explain how you lost it
3. Tell the insurance company what you would like them to do
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing this letter to start the claim process on my travel insurance for a camera I lost during the trip.
To give you an idea about this canon camera, it was a DSLR which is what professional photographers use. Since it has a lot of features, the price is also on a higher end.
During this holiday, our group decided to go for a hike to the waterfalls. When we reached the spot, we took several photographs using the same camera. However, when we returned, I searched for it everywhere but could not find it.
As you can imagine, this was quite an unfortunate incident as I lost both - the camera and the photos. So, if you can assist with the claim process on insurance, I would be able to buy the same model using the reimbursed amount.
I look forward to hearing from you soon.
Yours Faithfully,
Anthony Gustavo
(157 words)
Task 1, please evaluate and give your valuable feedback
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mrbombastic
- Posts: 6
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goldcoastielts
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Re: Task 1, please evaluate and give your valuable feedback
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YouTube - "Task 1 General - FORMAL LETTER" : https://youtu.be/gEC3sC7UI-A
Thanks for your submission mrbombastic!! Please see my rewrite below ...
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing this letter to start the claim process on my travel insurance for a camera I lost during A RECENT trip.
(delete "To give you an idea about this canon camera) FIRSTLY, THE DETAILS OF THE CAMERA ARE AS FOLLOWS: it was a DSLR which is what professional photographers use. Since it has a lot of features, the price is also on THE higher end (USUALLY ABOUT $1500-1600 RETAIL).
During this holiday, (delete "our group") THE GROUP THAT I WAS A PART OF decided to go for a hike to the waterfalls. When we reached the spot, we took several photographs using the same camera. However, when we returned, I searched for it everywhere but could not find it.
As you can imagine, this was quite an unfortunate incident as I lost both (delete "-") the camera and ALL the photos I HAD TAKEN ON THE TRIP. (delete "So,") If you can assist with the INSURANCE claim process (delete "on insurance"), I would be MOST GRATEFUL AS I WOULD BE able to buy the same model using the reimbursed amount.
I look forward to hearing from you soon.
Yours Faithfully,
Anthony Gustavo
The structure of this letter is excellent. Overall it is very good. Plerase check how to write a formal letter in the YouTube video linked above ...
Advice:
1. I would recommend adding a few more imaginary details to this kind of formal letter such as the price of the camera...
2. It might be nice to combine some of the sentences, especially in the paragraph about the waterfalls.
Band-score:
TA: 6.5
G: 6.0 (use more complex sentences)
V: 6.0
CC: 6.0
IELTS essay check : https://www.goldcoastielts.com/essays
Online IELTS lessons : https://www.goldcoastielts.com/lessons
IELTS Freebies!! : https://www.goldcoastielts.com/freebies
YouTube - "Task 1 General - FORMAL LETTER" : https://youtu.be/gEC3sC7UI-A
Thanks for your submission mrbombastic!! Please see my rewrite below ...
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing this letter to start the claim process on my travel insurance for a camera I lost during A RECENT trip.
(delete "To give you an idea about this canon camera) FIRSTLY, THE DETAILS OF THE CAMERA ARE AS FOLLOWS: it was a DSLR which is what professional photographers use. Since it has a lot of features, the price is also on THE higher end (USUALLY ABOUT $1500-1600 RETAIL).
During this holiday, (delete "our group") THE GROUP THAT I WAS A PART OF decided to go for a hike to the waterfalls. When we reached the spot, we took several photographs using the same camera. However, when we returned, I searched for it everywhere but could not find it.
As you can imagine, this was quite an unfortunate incident as I lost both (delete "-") the camera and ALL the photos I HAD TAKEN ON THE TRIP. (delete "So,") If you can assist with the INSURANCE claim process (delete "on insurance"), I would be MOST GRATEFUL AS I WOULD BE able to buy the same model using the reimbursed amount.
I look forward to hearing from you soon.
Yours Faithfully,
Anthony Gustavo
The structure of this letter is excellent. Overall it is very good. Plerase check how to write a formal letter in the YouTube video linked above ... Advice:
1. I would recommend adding a few more imaginary details to this kind of formal letter such as the price of the camera...
2. It might be nice to combine some of the sentences, especially in the paragraph about the waterfalls.
Band-score:
TA: 6.5
G: 6.0 (use more complex sentences)
V: 6.0
CC: 6.0
