English has become an international language in this technological era and it is spreading day by day to communicate with each other. It is true that the benefits of English as an international language are far more than its drawbacks. I totally agree with this statement and numerous of reasons behind it.
There are several merits of English as a global language. First and foremost reason is that businessmen can easily commence their trade around the world because there is no language barrier. They can easily employ efficient workers from the world. Secondly, in modern world, technology plays significant role in human’s life and all gadgets and other electronic goods are using English language to operate that things. However, mobile phone has become an amazing gadget and it reaches in every person’s pocket to communicate. Thirdly, nowadays people who know English, they are easily getting career opportunity in home country as well as in overseas. Moreover, with the help of English we can easily interact with each other in an effective way.
On the other hand, there are some negative impacts of English language. It has a lot of adverse effect on other culture and languages because many languages are destroying due to spread of English language. It is often said that a disappear language means disappear a culture. Furthermore, English language is a difficult language and to learn it is not possible for everyone.
In conclusion, I believe that English language has a lot of advantages but we cannot ignore its disadvantages.
Task 2 Please evaluate - The advantages of the spread of English as a global language will continue to outweigh its disa
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raviwaraich95
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goldcoastielts
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Re: Task 2 Please evaluate - The advantages of the spread of English as a global language will continue to outweigh its
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Thanks for your submission raviwaraichi95!! Please see my rewrite below ...
INTRO:
English has become THE international language in this technological era and it is spreading day by day WHICH HELPS PEOPLE ALL OVER THE WORLD TO communicate with each other. It is true that the benefits of English as an international language are far more than its drawbacks .. THERE ARE FAR MORE BENEFITS THAN DRAWBACKS TO HAVING ENGLISH AS AN INTERNATIONAL LANGUAGE. I totally agree with this statement and WILL GIVE numerous reasons BELOW TO SUPPORT it.
B1:
There are several merits TO HAVING English as a global language. First and foremost IS THE reason (delete 'is') that businessmen can easily commence their trade around the world because there is no language barrier AND they can easily employ efficient workers from ALL OVER the world. Secondly, in THE modern world, technology plays A significant role in human life and all gadgets and other electronic goods USE THE English language IN THEIR OPERATING MANUALS. Mobile phoneS HAVE ALSO BECOME amazing gadgetS and it reaches in every person’s pocket to communicate .. AND WE CAN NOW FIND ONE IN NEARLY EVERYBODY'S POCKET. Thirdly, nowadays people who know English, (delete 'they') are easily FINDING career opportunitIES in BOTH THEIR home country as well as (delete 'in') overseas. Moreover, with the help of English we can easily interact with each other in an effective way.
B2:
On the other hand, there are some negative impacts of HAVING English AS THE GLOBAL language. FIRSTLY, THERE ARE a lot of adverse effectS on other cultureS and languages because many languages are destroyED due to spread of THE English language. It is often said that WHEN a LANGUAGE disappearS, a culture ALSO DISAPPEARS. Furthermore, THE English language is a difficult language and to learn AND it is not possible for everyone TO DO SO.
CONC:
In conclusion, I believe that THE English language has a lot of advantages but we cannot ignore its disadvantages.
Advice:
1. Don't use connecting words like 'however' when it is not appropriate. At the beginning of your fourth sentence in the B1 you started with 'however'. This made it very difficult to understand.
2. Don't use double subjects ("nowadays people who know English, (delete 'they') are easily getting ...")
3. Make sure you use articles properly (THE English language).
4. Try to write a little more in the conclusion. Two or three sentences that summarise the body paragraphs would be better....https://youtu.be/sJUv_jUk0WA
5. Try to make the body paragraphs about the same length.
Band-score:
TA: 5.5
G: 5.5
V: 6.0
CC: 5.5
IELTS essay check : https://www.goldcoastielts.com/essays
Online IELTS lessons : https://www.goldcoastielts.com/lessons
IELTS Freebies!! : https://www.goldcoastielts.com/freebies
YouTube - "TASK 2 LINKING LANGUAGE" : https://youtu.be/slnYl_2WXjw
Thanks for your submission raviwaraichi95!! Please see my rewrite below ...
INTRO:
English has become THE international language in this technological era and it is spreading day by day WHICH HELPS PEOPLE ALL OVER THE WORLD TO communicate with each other. It is true that the benefits of English as an international language are far more than its drawbacks .. THERE ARE FAR MORE BENEFITS THAN DRAWBACKS TO HAVING ENGLISH AS AN INTERNATIONAL LANGUAGE. I totally agree with this statement and WILL GIVE numerous reasons BELOW TO SUPPORT it.
B1:
There are several merits TO HAVING English as a global language. First and foremost IS THE reason (delete 'is') that businessmen can easily commence their trade around the world because there is no language barrier AND they can easily employ efficient workers from ALL OVER the world. Secondly, in THE modern world, technology plays A significant role in human life and all gadgets and other electronic goods USE THE English language IN THEIR OPERATING MANUALS. Mobile phoneS HAVE ALSO BECOME amazing gadgetS and it reaches in every person’s pocket to communicate .. AND WE CAN NOW FIND ONE IN NEARLY EVERYBODY'S POCKET. Thirdly, nowadays people who know English, (delete 'they') are easily FINDING career opportunitIES in BOTH THEIR home country as well as (delete 'in') overseas. Moreover, with the help of English we can easily interact with each other in an effective way.
B2:
On the other hand, there are some negative impacts of HAVING English AS THE GLOBAL language. FIRSTLY, THERE ARE a lot of adverse effectS on other cultureS and languages because many languages are destroyED due to spread of THE English language. It is often said that WHEN a LANGUAGE disappearS, a culture ALSO DISAPPEARS. Furthermore, THE English language is a difficult language and to learn AND it is not possible for everyone TO DO SO.
CONC:
In conclusion, I believe that THE English language has a lot of advantages but we cannot ignore its disadvantages.
Advice:
1. Don't use connecting words like 'however' when it is not appropriate. At the beginning of your fourth sentence in the B1 you started with 'however'. This made it very difficult to understand.
2. Don't use double subjects ("nowadays people who know English, (delete 'they') are easily getting ...")
3. Make sure you use articles properly (THE English language).
4. Try to write a little more in the conclusion. Two or three sentences that summarise the body paragraphs would be better....https://youtu.be/sJUv_jUk0WA
5. Try to make the body paragraphs about the same length.
Band-score:
TA: 5.5
G: 5.5
V: 6.0
CC: 5.5
