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my writing

Posted: Wed Oct 09, 2013 10:33 pm
by bunnyrabbit
hello, I am posting my writing on the topic that I got on my IELTS. I do not remember what I exactly wrote ,but I got 6,5 which is not enough.Please leave a comment anyone , I will apricate it.

School should be obligatory until the age of 18.

These days education is important for every single individual in order to be able to find a decent job and in everyday life. People often question whether school should be obligatory until eighteen.In my opinion students should stay at school util the age of eighteen. This will be proven by looking at how school is important for its social education role and by underlining the importance of learning at the young age.
First, school plays not only the role of an educational institution but also is important for its socialising purpose. We can argue whether we can teach our children at home or not and we may be right , but what we cannot teach them i how to behave in social situations. For example, I was very shy and detached from people when I first came to school at six . With the time I gained social confidence and other social skills that I could learn only because of being in the group of people. This is why schooling until at least eighteen is very important for social development.
In addition to this, an education in the young age he s very important because of the brain development that does not stop until the age of 21.That is why people should train and exercise their brains to achieve maximum "brain strength" while the brain is still in development. For example , I know a girl that was very poor at mathematics but once she was 16 she became interested and motivated to learn. By the end of highschool she was the best student at school , winning national awards in the field of mathematics. This proves that development is an individual process and to achieve an academic success we need to continue learning.Sometimes talent and understanding comes later and we need to spend some time working on our skills. it is obvious from this, that school should be prolonged at least until eighteen.
After analyzing those two positive aspects that prove proper education until the age of eighteen is essential for the youngsters, it is clear that school should stay obligatory until eighteen.
Thus , it is recommended that young people attend school until the mentioned age.

School should be obligatory until the age of 18. 2

Schooling system and its purpose in upbringing children has been recently questioned many times. It is obvious for everyone that young people need an education but education do not always mean school. In my opinion children do not need to go to school until they are eighteen.This will be proven by looking at how homeschooling brings great benefits to children and by analysing some examples of successful people that were uneducated.
Firstly,there are numerous examples of people who decide to not send their children to school. I also know some children that ended their high school education earlier that by eighteen. For example ,one of successful artists P. Wolf decided to quit school when he was fourteen and he focused on playing music and working. Later on he passed exams and got to higher music school thank to the years he spend practising music.This shows that in order to be successful one does not need to go to school until eighteen and therefore school should not be obligatory.
Secondly, a lot of people can get education without necessarily going to any kind of school but prepare at home to pass the necessary exams .This may be considered as an alternative for traditional school system and often brings remarkable results. For instance, I watch an internet show about family that travels around the world and has no other way to educate their children as by teaching them themselves.The children seem to be very wise and focused .This may prove that school education is unnecessary and schooling until 18 is not supported .
After analysing those arguments it has been proven that going to school until the age of eighteen is not essential in order to get education.Thus it is predicted that people will drop school more often in the future.

thanks , Monika